


Very Desperate Measures

by Verve



Category: Fishbones - Jisuk Cho
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-15
Updated: 2014-07-15
Packaged: 2018-02-09 00:54:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,779
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1962798
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Verve/pseuds/Verve
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Demos VS Anime Otaku</p>
            </blockquote>





	Very Desperate Measures

A handful of students milled around the east wing of Saint Basil's Private Academy. The echo of slamming lockers reverberated in the narrow tiled corridor. Books were shoved haphazardly into backpacks as quick goodbyes were exchanged. Most of the underclassmen had gone home early to study for finals, APs, and SAT exams. However, two seniors remained rooted in the hallway. The pair appeared oblivious to the students around them.

"It's your fault that you're in this mess. Stop being a lazy ass!"

Demos ignored his friend and casually flipped through a dog-eared, water-stained, navy blue tome. It easily weighed over 4.5 pounds. His thumb stopped roughly midway through the book. "I think that the final covers chapters one through sixteen. Or was it nineteen? Oh well, whatever. I already studied chapters one and two, so I only need cheat sheets for fourteen chapters!" The slender Italian retrieved six sheets of lined, loose-leaf paper from his designer briefcase and slid them into the open textbook. He wore his most charming smile. A trio of girls near the doorway noticed Demos and swooned. However, Ferris wasn't buying it. The Jewish nerd glared at his best friend like a hawk. He closed his eyes, adjusted the glasses on the bridge of his nose, and ground his teeth. Invisible steam spouted from his ears.

"Fourteen chapters!? You expect me to learn a fucking year's worth of Japanese in four days? What the hell are you thinking!?" Ferris struggled to regain his composure. He sensed an incoming migraine; it was a shame that the aspirin bottle in his briefcase was empty. Seven AP classes and involvement with the mob would give anybody a headache. Sometimes Ferris wondered if he was becoming addicted to painkillers. He leaned his head against a locker and groaned.

"Look, it can't be that bad! Remember when you wrote answer keys for Ms. Coleman's Calculus BC class when we were just freshmen? We made hundreds from those. Surely you can do this." 

Ferris met the Italian's gaze with a deadened expression. His eyes were dull from lack of sleep and a constant, gnawing anxiety over college admissions. Didn't Demos understand what Yale signified to Ferris? The teenage genius knew that he would need to maintain a 3.5 GPA in order to meet Yale's post-admission requirements. However, he doubted that he would be accepted to the top-ranked Ivy League school. Perhaps he would be forced to settle for Harvard.

"Ferris... if I don't pass Japanese 1, then I won't be able to graduate. Please. I'm sorry for not giving you earlier notice, but you're the only one who can help me." Demos' smile faltered. He shifted his gaze to the marble seraphim that sat atop the arched windows. A heavy silence filled the hall. The slim Italian nervously tucked a stray hair behind his ear. Outside, a coach blew a tin whistle, which announced the end of soccer practice. The shrill noise sliced through Ferris' migraine like a searing sword. His thick eyebrows knitted together in pain. He wearily opened and closed his eyes. 

"I don't get it. Why did you sign up for Japanese in the first place? Why not French? Your knowledge of Italian would have made learning another Romance language a piece of cake."

Demos remained silent. He felt guilty for putting his friend on the spot. It was his fault that he had registered late for the spring quarter; Japanese had been the only elective that was still open. However, Demos knew better than to further aggravate his best friend with that anecdote. Ferris was currently enrolled in Physics AP, Literature AP, Economics AP, Calculus BC AP, Chemistry AP, U.S. Government AP, and Psychology AP. He had already finished every other AP class that Saint Basil's offered. Demos felt somewhat insecure about what would happen to their friendship after graduation. He was certain that they would part ways; Ferris would leave for Yale and Demos would becoming increasingly involved with the mob. Perhaps it was better that way. There had been too many close calls. At night, Demos lay in his bed staring at the ceiling, replaying events that had nearly gotten them both killed. He dreamed about an exchange that had gone wrong. It involved O'Brien, blood, and the edge of a skyscraper. In his mind, he would scream, "Ferris, get away from here! Please, let go of my hand... you can't die here. Please, just let me go!"

Demos always awoke up before the scene reached a conclusion. The dream haunted his sleep. The sense of helplessness, guilt, and loss overwhelmed his senses. What if Ferris had actually died? Demos wasn't sure if he could ever recover from losing his best friend. Maybe it would be best if Ferris started a new life at Yale. A safe life that wasn't poisoned by crime, greed, and vengeance.

Demos placed the Japanese textbook under his arm. The corners of his mouth tilted upwards, but the mischievous twinkle was missing from his eyes. "It's okay, Ferris, I've come up with a backup plan. There's an Anime Club meeting from three to four today in Mr. Takada's classroom. The girl who sits behind me asked me to go. I can't remember her name, but I can tell that she's really obsessed about Japanese stuff. It shouldn't be hard to convince her to make a cheat sheet. I mean, there isn't a girl at Saint Basil's who can resist my good looks."

"You're such a conceited bastard."

"Hehe." Demos patted his friend's shoulder and continued down the hallway.  
\------

Demos was unprepared for the group of girls who tackled him as he walked through the doorway of Room 555. "O M G, Demos, you came!" squealed a tall girl with long blonde pigtails. She was at least five inches taller than him and weighed approximately thirty pounds more. The ecstatic girl roughly dragged him into the room. The confused Italian raised an eyebrow at his classmate's short blue skirt, white gloves, and knee-high red boots. 

"Uh... thanks for inviting me?" 

A short brunette wearing a pair of cat ears and glasses happily hugged him from behind. "You're right Ayu-chan, he really does look like Lelouch from Code Geass! He's so KAWAII!!"

The costumed blonde narrowed her eyes at the smaller girl. "See, I told you so. Now stop glomping him!" Her voice held an edge of jealousy. The cat girl reluctantly let go. Demos eyed the door and estimated his chances of escaping successfully. Unfortunately, the odds were not in his favor.

"So... Ayu-chan? Wait, I thought that the teacher called you by a European name. I'm sorry, my memory is pretty bad," laughed Demos. His smooth speech hid the increasing feeling of unease in his stomach. These girls were creepy.

"Her name isn't really Ayu-chan. It's Margaret. But we all have Japanese names in the anime club because it's so much more KAWAII! I'm Sayuri, and the girl wearing the white bodysuit and blue wig is Rei. She's named after the anime character from Evangelion." The girl scratched her left kitty ear and winked. "NYAO!"

Demos backed away from the kitten girl. His shoulder blades hit a brick wall. 

"So, I bet there's a secret reason why you cover that right eye with those bangs! You're probably hiding a Geass there!"

"Yeah, I've heard some people say that it's because you're emo, but we know the truth! You're Lelouch! You're super skinny, have long bangs, avoid P.E., sleep in class, and manage to charm everyone. And there's something mysterious about you. It's as if you're hiding something. I bet that you're secretly planning to gain control over South Port, then New York, and then the entire world! The evidence is undeniable. You're definitely Lelouch vi Britannia!" squealed Margaret. She struck an odd pose, with one hand on her hip and the other hand holding a peace sign over her eyes like a disco dancer. "Moon power!"

Demos tightened his grip on the Japanese textbook. He forced a polite smile. "Anime characters are not real. I don't even know who Lelouch is!" replied the mobster. Demos had thought that conning these club members would be simple. However, he was trapped against a wall and beginning to sweat.

"Since you're Lelouch, can I be your C.C.? O M G I looove Lelouch and C.C. fan fics! I bleached my hair blonde to match Sailor Moon's, but I can easily dye it green like C.C.'s! In fact, I was planning to make a C.C. costume for Kawaii Anime Con!" gushed Margaret. Her grin reminded Demos of a Chesire cat.

"Um... okay. Marg- I mean, Ayu-chan, I was wondering if you could help me study for the Japanese final? I haven't had the courage to talk to you after class, but I think that you're really smart and beautiful. Do you want to grab some coffee later tonight? I'd love a study date," smiled Demos. The anime otaku gaped at him. "In fact, I'm free for the rest of the week, so maybe we could hang out and review for finals together?" The Italian had honed the art of lying as an essential tool of his trade. However, the words that spilled from his mouth disgusted him. Fortunately, these girls acted as if they had never had a boyfriend; they savoured every line that he spoke. Sayuri and Rei were slightly dejected because they hadn't been chosen, but they were too mesmerized to leave.

As Demos spoke, he was mentally delegating his criminal responsibilities to other family members. Each would demand favors in return, but the teenager would deal with that later. The bodega on Avenue D hadn't paid their protection fees for five weeks. Stolen furs needed to be transferred to the warehouse in two days. The Giorgettis were still keeping tabs on Detective Lee, and this week had been Demos' turn to collect the Korean's secret files.

The charismatic Italian was already formulating break-up lines as he agreed to meet Margaret at eight. She was a sophomore and he was a senior, so it would be natural if the two drifted apart after graduation.

"So, Lelouch... now that we're boyfriend and girlfriend, I was wondering if you wanted to go to prom with me?"

The other girls ooh-ed and aah-ed. 

Shit.

"...It would be my pleasure, Ayu-chan." Demos brushed a stray hair from her cheek. 

He calculated that it would only take a little alcohol to get Margaret drunk. After that, he'd be free to chill with Ferris and pretend that this horrifying Anime Club experience was never a chapter in his life.


End file.
